Real Love Rides Even When Not Reciprocated
Power Quote Love others when they least deserve it, for two reasons. Often, that's when they are in need of love the most, secondly, it was Jesus' parting instructions before His death.
I went to visit one of the players I mindset mentor and faith coach, let's call him JoJo. JoJo, or as he is known by his teammates, J Money had just finished playing a home game. When he came out of the locker room to visit with me he was visibly frustrated.
He was in no mood to socialize with friends, family and fans and instructed me to follow him back to his apartment. On the walk back he yelled, "bruh, I'm so pissed off. Vic stays not passing me the ball, and it's intentional bro. It's not just me, but everyone, he's only in it for himself, how much money he can make form NIL, how many points he can score. I can't stand how selfish he is!"
JoJo, who is a young man of faith, was hosting a post game dinner. His dad, who lived in Louisiana was an award winning cajun chef who made authentic gumbo that taste so good it make you want to slap your mama. As you could imagine, JoJo's teammates looked forward to these post game dinners as they were by far better than the food they ate throughout the week at the cafeteria.
JoJo chose not to invite J Money, when I asked why, his response was, "F, him, I ain't inviting his selfish A$&, everyone else on the team rides for one another, but not him, since he wants to be about himself, he can eat by himself."
It Ain't the Move 🚫 - Do you feel where J Money is coming from, because I do! Competetive sport culture, be it, you are a coach, or a player is filled with backstabbers who only look out for themselves, and personally, I have many JoJo like moments where I was fed up with selfish, ungrateful and even ungodly people and felt justified in not showing them love.
What I had to realize and what JoJo needed to as well, is that if I am to be a God-first player or coach who strives to be Christ-like, how JoJo responded and how I have in the past, is not the move.
Jesus, left us instructions before He left the Earth in human form. (John 13:33-35 - Dear children, I will be with you only a little longer. And as I told the Jewish leaders, you will search for me, but you can't come where I am going. 34 So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. 35 Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.")
Jesus explains in those verses that He wants us to follow His example and continue on what He started by not giving those around us the world's love, but instead to love others the way that He loves us. So that you do not have to wonder how Jesus loves us, the Bible makes it abundantly clear, in Romans 5:8. (Christ proved and displayed His love by dying in our place while we were still lost and ungodly (still sinners) - the absolute worst version of ourselves.
As mentioned, not inviting Vic to the dinner was not the move for one that is God-led and Christ-like. Instead the move is to love others when they are still _________.
Still:
Selfish
Lazy
Un-Coachable
Tripping
Spazzing Out
Putting themselves over the team
The absolute worst teammate/coach they can be
Reflection Dig Deeper 🤔
When Have You Struggled to Love Someone Who Wasn't "Riding" for You? 💔
What made it challenging?
How did your faith perspective shift your approach?
On the Court: Who Needs Your Christ-Like Love Right Now? 🏀
Name the specific situation
What would loving them like Christ look like practically?
Off the Court: Who Are You Holding Back Love From? 🌍
What's preventing you from extending grace?
How might Jesus view this person differently?
Accountability Check 🕊️
How can you love someone WITHOUT accepting their toxic behavior?
Where's the line between grace and enabling?
Self-Reflection Zone 🔍
Who have you previously justified NOT showing Christ-like love to?
What unresolved hurt might be blocking your ability to love?
Bonus Challenge: Pick ONE person you've written off and pray about how to approach them with genuine, Christ-like love this week.
Disclaimer, love does not mean acceptance. In JoJo's case, while he should invite him to the dinner, that does not mean he should be ok with his teammate being selfish, maybe he should have team meeting, or express to the coach that Vic is playing selfishly and should not be on the court, in that case that does not mean he is not loving Vic in a Christ-loving way. Jesus was never afraid of conflict, however, He always led with and maintained His love in the midst of it.
*Personally, in my faith journey, God has challenged me, as it relates to others, to love better, and love more. While I don't think I was doing a "bad" job of loving the world around me, God gently showed me that I could love a lot better. He reminded me that Christ-like love is that standard, if I want to finish what He started. And when I do love in such a way, it proves, not by what I say, or what I post, that the Holy Spirit is real and living through me.