Please God, Not People
I am a pleaser; I believe we all are. I believe we were created with intention by God to please God.
We all either please God, ourselves, or others (or, which is impossible attempt to please all three) As for me, when my transformational relationship with God is distant, it becomes emotionally draining as I juggle between pleasing all three - God, myself, and others.
While there are times when I can please all three, more often than not, when you please one, the other two may not be pleased. While pleasing God will benefit us in the long run, frequently, what’s pleasing to us in the moment is not in our long-term or eternal best interest.
In a sense, that’s what it means to “surrender” to God, to say, “Lord, I want to please you and you only, even when it upsets others and even when it does not feel good to me. I will not waver.”
As we “surrender” and commit to pleasing God and God only, we must be spiritually prepared and transformed (Romans 12:2 - Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect). While we may desire to only please God, we must be humble and spiritually intelligent enough to know that this can only be done by making space and time in our lives for God to transform us into a whole new person - the best version of ourselves (think Isaiah 43:19 - "For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland").
If we never allow God to transform us, we must accept that we will, as stated in Romans 12:2, copy the behaviors and customs of this world, which will lead us to juggle between pleasing others and pleasing ourselves. This is not only dangerous but, as stated earlier, is exhausting.
*Please Note that subscriptions are donations - these posts are free of charge.
When you aim to please people, consider these three thoughts:
1) People will not clearly communicate what it is they want you to do that pleases them.
2) What pleases them will change, and that change could be drastic.
3)Their agenda is not always pure and forthcoming.
Practically speaking, you could have a boyfriend who is attracted to women with short hair. To please him, you chop off your beautiful long locks that you have been growing for years, only for him to wake up the next day and decide he is attracted to long hair. As a guy, your lady could share with you that she likes a man in a tailor-made suit. To please her, you save your money and drop $3500 on such a suit, only for her to change her mind and decide she likes a man that can look good dressed down in jeans and a hoodie. Professionally, your supervisor tells you they want someone who is proactive and takes initiative. While they tell you that, they could pivot and weeks later decide you aren’t the right person for the job because you don’t wait and follow the lead of your supervisors.
While the world and people do not have your best interest in mind and will frequently gaslight you, God, while His word is challenging and will push you to live outside of your comfort zone, it is straightforward and consistent. Also, His word can be trusted to always have your best interest in hand. In comparison, do you always have your long-term best interest in mind with the decisions you make? Obviously, we know that others/the world doesn’t.
⚠️ Be prepared!
(1) There will be times when choosing to please God will upset people, and often the people you upset are friends, family members, co-workers and teammates.
(2) There will be times when pleasing God will go against your agenda and what you want to do, and it will be uncomfortable and may not feel good in the moment. When those moments occur, remind yourself that everything that feels good, ain’t good; much the same, just because it does not feel good does not mean it ain’t good. (God’s agenda for me will, in the long run sustain my joy, protect me from evil and even protect from myself when needed.)
Hebrews 13:8 - Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.
Romans 12:2 - Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.
Romans 8:28 - And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.
Proverbs 4:1 - My children, listen when your father corrects you. Pay attention and learn good judgment, for I am giving you good guidance. Don’t turn away from my instructions.
2 Timothy 3:16-17 - All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.